9 Things You Can Learn From p0*rn.

1. First of all, you can learn what you like in a safe, non-judgmental environment. And if you’re apprehensive about asking your partner for some niche thing you’ve been considering (e.g. bondage, being called Ralph, et cetera), you can watch it first from the comfort of your own bed, solo. In your pajamas. With an Origins face mask on. 

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2. But your pórn-watching life doesn't have to overlap with your actual séx life. You might discover, to your surprise, that you are into watching a certain séx act (like a threésome) but not into doing it yourself. You don't have to! Maybe someday you will want to? But for now you have opened another door into your own séxuality by finding a new thing that gets you off — even if you're just watching it.

3. See what "normal" séx looks like and feel less awkward.Many women’s only exposure to pórn are those cheesy $29.99 Jenna Jameson videos that have nothing to do.No awkwardness, no weird noises, no uncomfortable condom fumbling, no screaming the name of your previous boyfriend  by accident, et cetera. But there is a whole range of pórn now: Feminist and/or woman-friendly pórn, amateur pórn, fetish pórn (NSFW!), you name it. Feminist pórn goes out of its way to feature real female órgasms, not the fake moaning and screaming you might associate with mainstream pórn.

4. Realize that your body is normal by watching other real non-pórn star human women banging. Some of us — uhh, me — used to be Not Okay With Our Vagínas.

Once you watch a few clips of Muggle people banging, you realize that all human beings/vagínas are their own unique snowflakes. And also that your vagína is actually pretty cool, in a Happy Meal Transformer toy kind of way.

5. Be louder during séx. And not for him. Hearing yourself lose your mind like that is a turn-on. (Kind of weird, but true.)

6. Step outside your missionary-position comfort zone. Sure, you don’t have to be flipped over every two seconds like a pancake on a griddle. But the variety of angles of pénetration you often find in a medium-length pórn clip can blow your mind if you are used to your regular blowjób-then-girl-on-top-then-missionary (then coffee ice cream in bed and The Daily Show) routine.

7. Realize and be able to articulate the difference between hard and fast, et al. You know that thing where you tell a guy that you like something, and he immediately starts doing it harder and faster, and you’re like, “I literally just said I liked it exactly the way you were doing it?" It is easier to notice this when you are watching it — and then when it happens to you, you'll be aware enough to point it out to your partner.

Guys can be sort of extreme in bed sometimes, because it will generally end the same way for them .

8. There’s really no good girl/bad girl dichotomy unless you want one. Mainstream, produced pórn has passed on the obsession of “good girl being bad” or “good girl being spanked” or “good girl being Pokemon” or whatever — which implies that women are their most desirable when they’re non-séxual beings who are suddenly hyper-séxual (but non-threateningly) (for one guy) (within reason) in bed. The more you watch normal women banging, making normal jokes, having normal, non-actress séx, the more you — and your partner — understand that women are just as séxual as men are.

9. You'll find new ways (and toys to use) to masturbate. Why yes, some everyday, normal girls do go home and use an enormous flashing cupcake-shaped vibrator, or what have you. It's like the less-dull version of reading séx toy product reviews.

  And being single doesn't have to doom you to a boring séx life. It may sound obvious, but you don't need a guy or many guys to have an exciting séxual life. Not only is it safe, but watching pórn adds variety. There are tons of tools for daily órgasms at your disposal.