Akpos Returns from Work, Enters sitting room to meet his wife...

Akpos comes back from work. As he enters the sitting room, his wife asked:
Wife: Darling! Why are you looking so sad?
Akpos: Sweetheart, I have a problem at my office.
Wife: Don’t say you have a problem. You should say we have a problem because we are now married. Your problem is also my problem.
Akpos: OK, we have a problem in our office.
Wife: And what is the problem, darling?
Akpos: Our secretary is pregnant for us.
Wife: Whaaat!!! The wife fainted!

Akpos & John turn on T.V

One day Akpos and John were
watching T.V when
the news came on, showing a man
standing on a
bridge about to commit suicide,
suddenly Apkos said “I’ll bet N500 that the guy won’t
jump off”,
John said I bet N500 that he will
jump.

Akpos with 30 inches Penls went to a magician

Akpos with 30 inches penls went to a
magician and said, "I can't live with
this
anymore! Its too long! Can you help
me
reduce it?" The magician answered, "There is a
female
frog in that swamp. Go ask her to
marry you.
She will say 'NO' and you will loose
5 inches off your organ."

Between EMEKA and Akpos!

EMEKA: You are a fool Akpos! You
don't know anything!
AKPOS: Hahan Emeka! It's a lie!

EMEKA: It's true! I will prove it. If
you see two rays of light on the road
at night, what will you call it?

AKPOS: A car!

EMEKA: Ehen, but which kind of car?

Akpos was on his way back home early one morning when he came across robbers.

Akpos was on his way back home
early one
morning when he came across
robbers. They
got hold of him. He struggled and
struggled but they over powered him.

HILARIOUS AKPOS: Akpos has been admiring his neighbour’s wife

Akpos has been admiring his
neighbour’s wife. The neighbour’s
wife always gives him this seductive
smile whenever they greet each
other. Akpos didn’t know how to
approach the lady to tell her of his desires … because she’s married.
So, one day the lady herself
approached Akpos alone in his
apartment.

Between Akpos and Ekaitte Again

How it began] Akpos: Baby, I'm gonna tell you a
story with 4 parts. Remember that, 4 parts!
Ekaitte: "Alright love..." Akpos: "Okay, I'm gonna
start with part 1. There was a husband and a
wife, they were driving to a campsite when they
came upon a split road. The husband says "let's take the left one."The wife says "I think we
should take the right road." The husband slaps
the wife across the face "who's driving, me or
you?" and they take the left path." Ekaitte:

Akpos mistakenly sent 800 Thousand....

Akpos mistakenly sent 800 Thousand
Naira to a wrong phone number
via Mobile Money. Akpos realized
that before the person withdraws the
whole money, he had to think of what to do if
he wants to get his money back from the person phone number. He
immediately
sent a text:

Akpos was arrested by the police and taken to court.

Magistrate: Akpos, you were arrested on the
expressway for abruptly stopping your car in the
middle of the road and causing 10 other vehicles
behind you to run into one another thereby
causing damages and injuries. Are you guilty or
not?

AKpos: At a doctor's office

At a doctor's office, minutes towards midday, a man arrived complaining of serious backache.
The doctor examined him and asked; What the hell did you do to your back?
The man replied; You know that I am a bouncer at a local nightclub?
Yesterday morning I got home to my flat quite early and heard a
noise in my bedroom. On entering I knew someone is sleeping with my wife as my wife was lying naked in bed and the balcony door was open. I rushed out through the balcony door and did not find anyone. As I looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out of the building and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him. That is how I strained my back.

Akpos, a driver who survived in a tragic accident...

Akpos, a driver who survived in a tragic accident
which rendered 50 people dead at Lagos-Ibadan
Express Way was remanded in police custody to
assist in police investigation.
Here is the Interrogation:
POLICE: Mr Akpos, how did you end up killing 50
people?

AKPOS - Jokes

AKPOS LAUGH TIME!!!
E get one particular restaurant
wey i dey
chop 4 GRA,
E get one oyibo wey
dey always come chop there too...
Any tym dis oyibo chop finish he
go shout ''
Hey'',
so I

Between Ochuko and Akpos

Ochuko walks into a bar
and sees his friend, Akpos
at a table drinking by
himself. Approaching
Akpos, he comments, "You
look terrible. What's the
problem?"

Akpos the house help, entered Madam's room without knocking.

Akpos the house help,
entered Madam's room
without
knocking.

Akpos visits an electronic shop.

A man Akpos went to an
electronic shop.
He asked the shopkeeper;
What is the price of this
television?
The shopkeeper replied;
We don't sell our products
to Akpos.

A conversation between Akpos & Joy

Akpos : How old are u ?
Joy : A Woman never tells
her age.
Akpos : Just tell me your
age.
Joy : since I was 18 i never
told anyone my age.
Akpos : But I will make

A man Akpos went to an electronic shop.

A man Akpos went to an electronic shop.
He asked the shopkeeper; What is the price of this television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don't sell our products to Akpos.
Akpos again came the next day after cutting his beard.
He asked; What is the price of this television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don't sell our products to Akpos.
The next day Akpos came with a different face and asked; What is the price of this television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don't sell our products to Akpos.
Akpos got irritated and asked the shopkeeper; How do you recognise me everytime?
The shopkeeper replied; Because this is not a television. It is a microwave oven.
One word for Akpos.

Akpos, Principal and Aunty Susan

Aunty Susan was having a problem with Akpos in her class.
Akpos said 'M'am, I should be in SS3, i'm smarter than my friend Musa and he's in SS3'.
Aunty Susan had heard enough of Akpos' complains & took him to the Principal's office.
She explained everything to the Principal who decided to test Akpos with some questions that an SS3 Student should know.
PRINCIPAL : What's 3+3?
AKPOS : 6
PRINCIPAL : 6+6?
AKPOS : 12.
And so on.
The Principal asked Akpos many questions and he got them right

Akpos gets a Job

Akpos was once employed in a
school and he went to
the
class to teach.
The first day.
Akpors: Good morning students
Students: Good morning sir!
Akpos: I'm going to be your new
biology teacher, so do u know
what we have this

Between Father-In-Law and Akpos

Father-In-Law: Young
man, you are
coming to seek my
daughter's hand in
marriage and you are
chewing
chewing gum. That's a
sign of
disrespect.